self-editing Archives - Lisa Hall-Wilson

Buffy vs Bella: Why Your Characters Need To Be Proactive

April 25, 2018 by Lisa Hall-Wilson Leave a Comment

Characters who make decisions that push the story forward are more engaging, more interesting, and more like-able than characters who are passive. This is a mistake I continue to make over and over. It doesn’t seem to matter how well I know this lesson, it still creeps into my writing.

Bella Swan Is Passive

Bella Swan from Twlight is a passive character in at least the first 1.5 books of that series. She decides to go to Forks to live with her father, and then the rest of the book is stuff happening to her. She doesn’t make very many decisions that influence the outcome of the next plot event. She’s nearly hit by a truck. Edward decides to date her even though his family doesn’t want him to. He decides to take her home to meet this family and play baseball. He’s the one who recognizes the danger she’s in and decides they have to leave. Over and over this happens where someone else decides what Bella will do, where she will go, etc. She makes proactive decisions here and there, but mostly she just lets life pummel her and does her best to survive.

Buffy Summers

Buffy of Buffy The Vampire Slayer is a proactive character. Buffy decides to fall in love with a vampire. Buffy decides to sneak out of class, to take on a vamp by herself, to lie to her mom, etc. Buffy gets herself into and out of trouble in every episode–all while wearing cute shoes.

Diagnosing A Passive Character

When you’re trying to diagnose whether a character is passive or not, for each new plot event ask yourself what that character did to get themselves in that predicament. The inciting incident, the problem that kicks off the story, happens to the character. They’re sucker punched and left for dead on the side of the story road – what are they going to do about it? They have to DO something to get the story started. I’m going to outline a story of mine that’s been sitting in a drawer for years that will probably never see the light of day.

Laurel loses her job, can’t pay her rent, and can’t find another job. (This is a story problem that’s happened TO Laurel. Almost every inciting incident forces the character into a passive role.)
Laurel reconciles with her estranged husband. (This is OK as long as Laurel is the one initiating the reconciliation. If the ex happens to come to her and offers her a place to live because he’s heard she lost her job – that makes her passive.)
Laurel finds out she’s pregnant. (This is OK as long as Laurel’s made the decision that put her in this predicament. If she’s pregnant because she got drunk and her ex took advantage of her, she’s passive.)
Laurel gets offered her dream job. (This is OK as long as Laurel has sought out this opportunity–she’s reached out to a friend, answered a job ad, secretively met with an old flame she knows has a connection – whatever. If this job opportunity falls out of the sky, Laurel is once again passive because she’s not directing the action of the story.)
Laurel chooses to keep baby and stay with ex, but has to give up her dream job. (She actively makes a decision, but the decision has to cost her something and it has to be directly related to the initial story problem. In this case, the job loss forced her to lose her independence so choosing to stay with her ex and give up her dream job — that would restore her independence, directly answers her initial story problem.)

This is pretty simplified. Credit to Les Edgerton for the process. (He runs a great 12 week critique class a few times a year that really hones in on these types of plot problems if you’re struggling.) Do you see how each story plot point could make a character passive/reactive or proactive? It’s all determined by whether the character put themselves in that predicament or it just happened to them. Be really objective about this. It’s crucial.

Why Do We Create Passive Characters?

When I’m stuck and can’t move ahead with a story, when I just can’t figure out where to go next or where to take my characters, passive characters creep in. Mostly, this is because I begin engineering the story instead of letting the characters lead the way. When I’m not sure where the character should go, what they should do, how they should react, I create plot events to keep the story moving and often that makes my character passive.

How well do you know your character? Like, really know them? Try interviewing them. When I get stuck, I drill down into the why. Why did you say that or act that way? What are you afraid will happen — what’s the worst case scenario here for you? What’s your goal for this scene/chapter? What would you rather say/do and why? Often, by the time I drill down through the why’s of a scene, it becomes clear that the character is reacting to events rather than causing them.

It’s A Setback, Not A Failure

Remember, learning that you have a passive character isn’t the end of the world. Depending on when your character became passive, it might require a serious rewrite but your story will be stronger, your character will be more engaging, and you’ll hook readers and keep them reading. Those are all wins. How you get there is just details. Keep going.

Dive Deep!

Want to learn more about deep point of view? Heard about it and don’t know what it’s really about? Been told readers struggle to connect with your characters emotionally? Know about deep point of view, but stumped trying to find intermediate-level resources? Registration is now open for Method Acting For Writers: Learn To Write In Deep Point Of View. Class begins May 7 and the cost is $165CDN (approx $130USD).

What If Your Antagonist Isn’t Human – What’s The Secret Sauce Then?

March 15, 2018 by Lisa Hall-Wilson 1 Comment

In my last post, I looked at the secret sauce you need to make antagonists menacing. Today I want to go beyond basics with non-human antagonists. In school, we all likely learned the different types of conflict in literature:

human vs human (very common, no examples needed)
human vs himself (Hamlet, The Tell-Tale Heart, A Walk To Remember)
human vs nature (Lost in the Barrens, The Perfect Storm)
human vs supernatural (anything with vampires, werewolves, witches, demons, zombies, etc.)
human vs animal (King Kong, Godzilla, Ghost and the Darkness)
human vs society (Hunger Games, Handmaid’s Tale)

Not everyone likes to be put in a box, so there are other types of antagonists who don’t fit in these categories like time (sometimes it’s a plot device, sometimes it’s an antagonist), memory (faulty, spotty, unreliable), phobias or anxieties (preventing a character from reaching his goal), situations (they only have 12 amps to bring Apollo 13 back to earth)–you get the idea.

How To Recognize An Antagonist

Sometimes things can get really muddled in story land and it’s hard to know exactly who or what is the main antagonist. Some stories include villains, themes, and obstacles that can look like an antagonist. Flip to the beginning of the story. What’s the inciting incident? Whatever problem is caused by the inciting incident is the main story problem and whatever is causing or in opposition to the main story problem is the antagonist – generally.

Obstacles vs Antagonists

Many of the types of conflict above can also be just an obstacle. A man who is marooned on a mountain in a snow storm is in conflict with nature and if his goal is survival, then that’s a valid man vs nature conflict. However, if the man’s goal is make it off the mountain to kill the person who put him there, then the mountain (nature) is simply an obstacle. Do you see the difference?

An antagonist actively works to prevent the protagonist from reaching their goal. Even in man vs nature stories, where the weather or environment is indifferent, it can take on its own personality and seem vindictive or angry and throw its worst at the protagonist so they can’t succeed. There’s no story if the man stranded on the mountain happens to land there when a chinook wind passes through, melts all the snow, and he just walks back to civilization. Instead, the mountain will throw an Alberta Clipper at the man and bury him chest-deep in snow for a week, have rotten ice give way and toss him down an embankment so he breaks an ankle, and and and – as though the mountain is actively preventing the man from leaving, sees him as an intruder.

The key point is what’s your protagonist’s goal? This will directly flow out of your story’s inciting incident which should be emotionally gripping. They want/need this goal so much they won’t turn back no matter what. If nature, or animals, or some character flaw is just an obstacle then you need to make sure you have a compelling antagonist too. Let’s say we have a story about a man on trial for drunk driving and killing a pedestrian. His alcoholism is certainly a flaw he needs to overcome, but if his story goal isn’t getting clean then it’s just an obstacle. Maybe his goal is convincing a jury he’s innocent, or his story goal is to walk his daughter down the aisle at her wedding. These kinds of internal conflicts can be a compelling emotional arc, but it takes more than a man being an alcoholic for addiction to become the antagonist.

Personification

Now that you know you have a genuine antagonist that’s non-human, the difficulty becomes in showing that conflict. Many writers use personification–they give the nebulous antagonist a tangible shape or face. They use a proxy character. President Snow stands in for The Capitol in The Hunger Games. Often in stories where natural disasters are looming, there’s a radar that predicts the coming damage. There’s a live computer simulator they fight with trying to find a solution. There are naysayers, other antagonists and even villains working against the protagonist. Conflict is best when done face to face, so how can you give your non-human antagonist a face?

If your character is opposing a large faceless corporation, government, or societal will, have someone who defends what the protagonist is fighting against stand in for the antagonist. Readers want to put a name or a face to the “bad guy.” They want to know what the protagonist is fighting against. In The Lord of the Rings, the big bad antagonist is an evil force with no body or face, it’s just a lidless eye wreathed in flames, but it has a name–Sauron. The story was over when Frodo destroyed the ring and Sauron.

Fighting An Inner Character

Some characters have two sides to them. Think of werewolves or Jekyll and Hyde. These seem like human vs himself, but they’re really human vs human because their alter personalities act and think independently, sometimes without memory of what the other did. Even though the personalities inhabit one body, one is the protagonist and the other the antagonist. You write them as though they are two separate characters.

Ted Dekker’s novel Th3ee uses a character with split personalities, but you don’t know that until the end because you don’t get the antagonist’s point of view. Dekker’s construction of these two separate characters in one body who act and think independently is well done.

Create An External Force

In Nicholas Spark’s novel A Walk To Remember, Landon’s pride is the real antagonist but it’s shown through external forces. That conflict is shown through his distinct dissatisfaction with tangible things – his friends, his recreation choices, his volunteer work, Jamie’s father, his relationship with his father. It becomes a battle of wills with a visible result. Readers will feel cheated if at the end of the story it doesn’t feel like the protagonist has achieved anything.

Look at the movie Armageddon. What’s the main antagonist there? The surface story problem is the giant asteroid careening towards earth that will end all life as we know it. Harry Stamper agrees to take his team into space to destroy the asteroid and thereby save earth. However, the inciting incident is when Harry finds out his right-hand man AJ is sleeping with Grace (Harry’s daughter). Keeping Grace safe is Harry’s emotional goal and story problem so what stands in opposition to that (aside from the asteroid)? Pride. Harry’s and AJ’s pride serves as the antagonistic force for his emotional story problem. Harry agrees to destroy the asteroid to keep Grace safe (surface story problem and emotional story problem collide).

As Tolkien wrote in The Lord Of The Rings, there are some things time can’t heal — like PTSD. So even if the antagonistic force in your story isn’t one that can be overcome–like a recovered alcoholic can’t ever drink again–having a tangible external force to fight against that parallels or highlights the internal struggle still delivers a payoff (satisfying end) for readers.

Looking for more help writing an emotional story arc?

What kind of conflict or antagonistic force does your story use?

Editing In Layers Part 6: Consistency

January 9, 2018 by Lisa Hall-Wilson 4 Comments

This is the final step in the 5-pass read through editing plan. If you haven’t read the previous posts in this series I encourage you to do that. This is about the final read through. You’ve fixed all the issues (hopefully) and this is the last pass.

Let’s recap:

You can’t skip ahead. There may be early layers that you work through in the planning stage, but confirming the structure underpinning these beginning layers is crucial. If those first layers aren’t solid, the rest is a house of cards. If you don’t have a first draft or are struggling to complete one, this post on fast drafting might help.

Prep Work: Goals
Layer 1: Plot
Layer 2: Scenes and Sequels (Pacing)
Layer 3: (Weakness) Plus Characterization
Layer 4: Emotions
Layer 5: Consistency (you are here)

This is where you read through the entire manuscript in as close to one sitting as possible. I like to print it out for this stage, but you don’t have to. I do because seeing it on paper somehow helps me see things I’ve missed repeatedly on a screen.

I also read it out loud as much as possible. Hearing the story engages a different part of my brain and I can often catch things I’ve missed before. So the point of this layer is to simply make sure there aren’t any consistency errors.

In the previous layers there would have been changes. You’ve maybe moved a scene so you can’t refer to what happened there until later than before. Maybe you removed a character from the story so you need to make sure there’s no mention of them. This is where you catch those little errors that have slipped through.

As I’m reading I do a light proofread. I’m not doing an intense copy edit. I don’t bother doing word by word copy edits for spelling and punctuation until I’m about to hit publish. I just don’t see the point. When you’re constantly editing, getting bogged down by commas and misplaced modifiers is just a waste of time. I’ll watch for spelling, verb tense, pronouns — things that will stand out to me as I’m reading but I don’t sweat about it. If an error slips through to my beta readers they’re almost happy to point it out.

Understanding Structure

This editing process is for an intermediate level writer. If you are just beginning and maybe you’ve finished the first draft on your very first novel, be aware that I’ve made some assumptions in writing these posts. Mostly, I’ve assumed you understand story structure.

If you’re not familiar with the three act structure, this editing process might not be as helpful as it could be. If you don’t know how to recognize a character being proactive or reactive, this is pretty important. I assume you understand plot and how to create a compelling story arc. Creating characters with compelling story problems is essential.

I don’t get into the how-to’s on any of that but these are absolutely essential building blocks. What this editing process does is construct the interior frame and put up drywall on your story house. If you don’t have a good foundation and sound structure the whole thing will collapse no matter how pretty it is on the inside.

I’ve searched the interwebs for some posts on these basic structural needs. Buy a book or two. Take a class or two and make sure these concepts are really solid in your mind. I see so many writers trying to move from basic to intermediate without understanding these things. They learn to put really pretty lipstick on a pig, not realizing they’re just dressing up a pig.

How To Write Character Arc – Helping Writers Become Authors

Character Arc In A Nutshell – Writers Helping Writers

Creating Likeable Characters

The Character Arc – DIY MFA

How To Write A Story Without A Plot (And Why You Shouldn’t) – Helping Writers Become Authors

Story Arc Beat Sheets (Planning/Plotting Helps) – Jami Gold

Reactive and Proactive Characters: Bella vs Buffy

3 Act Structure and the Magical Middle Moment – James Scott Bell

Now – dive deep my scrivener friends! And hey – did you find this series helpful? Did you have questions? I’ve had questions come in from readers as I’ve been doing this series so I’ll be answering those in upcoming blog posts. Have a question, post it below or send me an email! I love mail!

DON’T FORGET!!! i have a class coming up!

Method Acting For Writers: Learn To Write In Deep POV

This interactive 3 week intensive is an intermediate level course designed to take your writing to next level fast! Want your writing to have an emotional punch? Want readers to connect with your characters in deeper ways? Learn to write in Deep POV. Class begins January 22, 2018.

Editing In Layers Part 5: Layering Emotions

January 2, 2018 by Lisa Hall-Wilson 3 Comments

This is part 5 in a 6 part series on getting a manuscript ready for beta readers. This is a systematic process where you read through your work 5 times and each pass focus on a specific element. This makes the editing more efficient and consistent. In the end, you’ve got something so much better than what you first envisioned when you sat down and typed that first word in chapter one (or wherever you started).

Let’s recap:

Prep Work: Goals
Layer 1: Plot
Layer 2: Scenes and Sequels (Pacing)
Layer 3: (Weakness) Plus Characterization
Layer 4: Emotions (you are here)
Layer 5: Consistency

The emotional punch is why readers pick up a book. They want to be entertained, to escape, to sigh and laugh and cry–this is where all that magic gets examined. In this layer, what you’re doing is making stylistic choices. So what I mean by that is there’s no right or wrong. You need to choose where to intensify the emotions, intensify the introspection, slow the pace and ask your characters some hard questions. I find it most helpful to get to a place where I won’t be interrupted for an afternoon or two and get down and dirty with this character.

This layer follows the layer on characterization intentionally, because you should know your character inside and out at this point. If you are working your way through this layer and realize you don’t have an answer to something, you might have a problem you haven’t spotted in a previous layer.

Be Objective…

It’s so important to be objective at each stage of this intense revision process. If you need to take a few days off between each layer go ahead and do that. Set yourself a specific time away where you’re going to work on other projects and then come back to it with fresh perspective.

I purchased Donald Maass’ book The Emotional Craft Of Fiction and basically work through the questions he has throughout the book. I sit with a notebook and force myself to answer two or three questions from each chapter.

Here’s an example of the kinds of questions he asks:

Select any moment in your story when your protagonist feels something strongly. Identify the feeling. Next, ask your protagonist, ‘What else are you feeling at this moment?’ Write that down, too. Then ask, ‘Okay, what else are you feeling now?’ Write that down. Now begin to work with that third, lower-layer emotion. What does it feel like to have this emotion? Is it good or bad to feel this way? Why? What would a better person feel instead? Justify this feeling – it’s the only possible thing to feel at this moment and here is why.

Here’s another:

Choose any small thing that happens somewhere in the middle of your manuscript. When you find it, write down your answers to the following questions: This small event is symbolic, but symbolic of what? What does it mean to your POV character personally? What meaning might anyone see if they bothered to look? How is your POV character’s understanding of himself changed in this moment even in a small way?

This won’t be easy. This is where you have to really pause. You have to simultaneously be objective and think through your story but also give yourself freedom to really FEEL your way through key scenes in your manuscript. I find this layer the most intense and physically draining.

Be Strategic…

Sorry to ruin the magic if you thought things like symbolism or emotional layering happened organically in the first draft. In this layer you are making stylistic choices, they must be intentional. You may find in this layer that there are layers of emotions to explore you hadn’t even thought of. You may find your character sharing things with you that you’d never thought to ask. Once you work through these questions, take those small snippets of emotional layering and skip to those places and edit accordingly. It might be as simple as changing a few words or as much as adding a paragraph. This layer shouldn’t change the plot or character arc but intensify the emotional arc.

When To Go Deep And When To Tell

In Layer 2 you examined and tweaked the pacing of your story. This layer deals more with the emotional pace. It’s OK to slow the action for a moment to add an emotional throat punch for readers. It’s OK to tell and use a shallow POV for specific effects such as showing your character is so overwhelmed they’ve stopped feeling anything at all. This is effective to show a character intentionally stepping away emotionally from a person or situation. That moment the character realizes their small place in a giant cog or puzzle, when they realize the consequences of failure or what they have to lose. Keep these emotional punches brief, a paragraph or two at the most.

You might find it effective in a moment of high tension to really back off the introspection and use a more wide angle lens to tell this part of the story. That could last for a mere sentence before you’re back to the action. You’re the director of a film and you can use showing and telling like a director uses his lens. They do with a brief shot of a actor’s face, a pause in the action for grief to flicker across their features–that’s what I’m talking about here.

How It Looks In Action…

Here are some questions I asked the protagonists in the novel I most recently edited to give you an idea of how I used the questions in the book as a jumping off point to intensify the emotional punch of the story. The character’s answers as I recorded them are in parenthesis:

Where are you most concerned about how others view you? What are you most afraid of? (*Points to a scene.* Will they still follow me? Will they think I’m a day late and a penny short?) What does that feel like? (Shame – they’ve been doing their duty and giving their lives for something I chose to ignore.) BOOM!
How would a braver person act in this situation? How would a more reckless person respond to this injustice? (He needs to DO something for the sake of those girls. Stop blaming others for his inaction. Stop hiding behind indecision.) What do you want to say to him? What are you afraid to say? (I need to stand up for her no matter what it costs me right now.) BOOM!
What’s something small that happens that’s symbolic of something much bigger? (When we take a moment to bandage each other up after the big fight.) What’s it symbolic of? What’s really being said without words? (It’s symbolic of forgiveness and responsibility. It means acceptance, a truce, humility.) How did that change you? (I set aside my first impressions and gave him the freedom to show me who he really is. Who he wants to be.) What did he teach you? (That the scars we have aren’t failures but show we survived what should have taken us down. That setting aside my first impressions scares me because if he’s not what I thought he was he might be someone I could love.)
What’s the worst thing that happens to you? The most traumatic, damaging, not-sure-you’ll-survive event? (This – points to scene at the 75% mark.) What else are you feeling? (Angry at myself because I couldn’t stop it.) What else? (Powerless because I couldn’t fight.) What else? (Unseen and unheard again. Worthless, not worth searching for.) That’s shame – what primary emotions are fueling that shame? (Fear, sadness, failure, embarrassment, regret, self-blame…) BOOM!
When did you learn something that surprised you? That made you stop and rethink something you’d thought to be true about yourself? (Here – points to a scene.) What were you feeling? (Anxious – new place, wanted to impress him — wanted him to be proud of me.) What are you afraid of? (That he’ll second guess his decision to marry me.) What do you want right now that would help you feel less anxious? (Be more in control. Desperate for control.) Is that what you’re really feeling or is that a cover up for something? What is seeking control helping you ignore? (I really want to feel safe. I’ve confused control with security.) BOOM!

It’s important to understand the difference between primary and secondary emotions, or emotions and feelings if that’s easier to understand. For the rest of this week, you can get my Writing Emotions In Layers 5-day E-course for free here.

How are you doing so far with these editing layers? I’d love to address any questions you might have in a future blog post. Send me an email or post the question below!