Are you where you want to be? Are you the person you hoped to be? Even if you know what to do or what needs to happen or change to reach those goals, do you lose motivation? Does your conviction waver while slogging through the trenches of daily grind and obligations?
I have been struggling with what feels like failure.
I told myself I would be published by the time I was 40. I made that promise to myself 13 years ago. But here we are. 5 or 6 manuscripts in a drawer, a staggering stack of rejections, several workshops/conferences/online courses and several obstacles later – and where am I? Same damn place. At least, that’s how it’s felt lately.
What About You?
Maybe you’ve had a goal or ambition in your life and you’ve doggedly soldiered on. Refusing to give up but not making much head way either. You make changes, you keep learning, and you don’t quit. But you get discouraged, beaten down, riddled with self-doubt. You’re alone.
I’ve become more and more aware of how much of a lone wolf I’ve become and how draining and discouraging that is. Like trying to run through thigh-deep water, you never seem to get very far very fast and you’re always tired and worn out.
I realized I needed a friend. So do you.
Perhaps you prefer the term tribe or community? Regardless, this is not a cry for help nor is it said with an air of oh-woe-is-me, but more self-revelation. When I had a friend who I worked closely with (even when we worked on our own projects) we encouraged, listened to, and pushed each other. Working alone I floundered and nearly quit.
Not only did I accomplish more surrounded by a tribe, I struggled less with depression, feeling exposed/vulnerable, or dream-stealing apathy.
Tired Of Being Tired? Thinking You Should Give Up?
When I realized this, I got up the gumption one day and took a chance. I reached out to a kindred goal-minded writer and asked her if she wanted to create a mastermind group. Now 3 of us (hoping to add one or two more) meet every week to kick each other in the behind and offer advice from our own expertise.
I stopped bemoaning my daily grind and instead went on a writing retreat with some friends to split the cost. We didn’t talk much, but I got a lot done and didn’t feel alone in the doing of it. I have two more booked for the summer.
What About You? What Do You Need To Start/Change/Quit To Keep Fighting For Your Dreams?
Whatever you’re striving for or working to achieve, surround yourself with like-minded people who will push you, pick you up, and cheer every two-footed jump in the deep end. They’re the ones who will understand what you’re sacrificing, where you need to go, and what goes through your head on days you feel defeated. Don’t rely on one friend. Take advantage of the hive mind. If one can’t meet, the other two can. Diversify.
This is what I’m doing to fight for my dreams. What are you going to do to stay motivated to chase YOUR dreams? Share in the comments. Say it out loud – there’s accountability in that!
Keep dreaming. Don’t quit!
Been told you should learn Deep Point Of View? Had an editor or critique partner tell you to “go deeper” with the emotions in your fiction? Looking for a community of writers seeking to create emotional connections with readers? Check out the Free Resource Hub and then join the Going Deeper With Emotions In Fiction Facebook group.