You always have choices

Saw The Amazing SpiderMan 2 (remix # I have no idea). Good movie though I’m not convinced that timid, can’t-raise-his-voice-geek-boy instantly turns bad and knows all kinds of fight moves…yeah-yeah – Is that where reality ended for me? I know.


However, as a fan of Gwen Stacy – finally a comic girlfriend who wasn’t constantly in need of rescuing, who was smart and had gumption — not happy with how that story line was left at the end of the movie. A Forbes article called it a ‘woman in refrigerator’ trope and I *with much sadness and fist-shaking* agree.

The first Andrew Garfield remix had a lot to say (to me) about secrets, the power of secrets, the cost of keeping secrets. (Read that post here.) This movie spoke to me profoundly about choices.

At the beginning of the movie, Gwen Stacy gives a valedictorian speech *with face-palm foreshadowing* and she talks about choices. We all have choices and those choices shape our character, our lives, the lives of those around us in profound and sometimes unsettling ways. Choose hope, she told her fellow graduates. Choose hope when you’re all alone, choose hope when it seems like all is lost. All the major characters are faced with very difficult decisions and, as usually goes hand in hand with these situations, there’s no clear-cut answers.

Can you own your own stuff?

Norman Osborn spent his life trying to find a cure for a genetic disease. The choices he made in the pursuit of that cure contributed to his moral failures, and those moral failures trickled down to Harry — Harry’s perceived self-values, etc etc etc. In contrast, Richard Parker refused to stay on a path that was leading him to a place he didn’t want to go, and he proactively took steps to find a new path. But that decision also had profound consequences for Peter, for Aunt May and Uncle Ben, etc etc etc. Richard was very aware of the repercussions of his decisions – both to stay on the current path or find a new path – whereas Norman never ever took responsibility for anything. Both Peter and Harry struggled with finding a sense of identity because of that lack, that gap in their childhoods. “We were both left behind,” Peter tells Harry.

Peter chose to let that experience make him stronger, while Harry chose the path of anger and bitterness. Those initial choices created a foundation that greatly influenced how they handled other challenges, set backs, and disappointments. Those initial choices set them on a course that as time passed became more and more difficult to deviate from — and sometimes that’s a positive and sometimes that’s a negative. Each of us live with a bit of both.

you always have a choice

At the Euchre game of life choices, you can’t help but play the hand you’re dealt in any given season. Sometimes you just get a crappy hand and you have to suck it up, sometimes you don’t have any trump cards. You don’t get to see which cards aren’t in play. You can’t always predict how another player will use their cards. Sometimes you’ll get euchred. You play out that season as best you can and hope the next season offers a better hand.

But YOU DECIDE who else is at the table. Who do you want across from you as a partner? Shame? God (your faith)? Your ego? Grace or Mercy? If your partner orders you up and decides to go it alone, can you handle the consequences? Who are your greatest opponents? Fear? Childhood trauma? Insecurity? Doubt? Anger? It’s unlikely you’ll win every hand, you might not even win the game for that season, but you gotta play it out and own how it ends.

You always have choices about your attitude, your outlook, your influence on others.

You decide how to handle the victory and losses. You decide if that loss, tragedy, injustice will make you stronger, grow your character, or fester and infect the rest of you. Will you allow bitterness to be the only player at the table or worse – is anger your partner? Did Harry and Peter have a choice in how to deal with the decisions their father’s made? Absolutely. Could they have changed their minds at any point and chosen a different path than the one they were on? Yet bet.

Even when life deals a sucky hand, you ALWAYS have a choice in how you’ll react, what you’ll learn, how you’ll treat others.

Did you see the movie? What did you think? Was there a message or theme that spoke to you?








  1. says

    I loved the movie. I’m really enjoying the new Spider-Man series as they’re more character-driven. I agree with your post. That’s what I got out of the movie too. We always have a choice with every circumstance that comes in our path. Thanks for sharing! Loved your post.
    Darlene L. Turner recently posted…From My Playlist – Nothing To Prove

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